The New Year!! and more :(

Well the new year is here and gone and it just does not seem that we switched years yet again. I had an okay new years eve, my fiance and I were supposed to attend a party and ended up just staying at his house because he didn't want to be around people. It didn't help that we had just had a fight an hour before the party was to begin.

Man this being engaged is hard stuff. Since that darn ring was put on my finger we have done nothing but argue and fight. He tells me all the time "well do you want this to be over, wanna break up"??? No you idiot I just want to be and let be. Que sera sera. I think is how it goes. I want to be in a relationship without jealousy, without vengence, without arguing, without fighting, without almost breakup talks, without stress.... But no there has to be jealous because he is jealous, there has to be vengence because he has to make everything fair, there has to be long talks and fights and arguments because he has to discuss how he is right and I believe wrong.

UGH!!!! So frustrating!! I am really starting to rethink this marriage thing. I asked him if we could just push the wedding date back to December so I had more time to pay off stuff and save up for the wedding, he wants to get married quick so we can have the honeymoon night... Who cares if we can do that or not, I want to have a memorable wedding and I want to be out of debt before that.

Well my new years blog went totally off track here. Yikes sorry!! All this frustration and nowhere to go with it.

I hope 2009 turns out to be way better than 2008 and even better than 2007. I guess I can only pray and see where this new turn takes me. Hopefully it will head me in the direction of school, maybe to be a preacher or a nurse or an electrician... You never know.