RN 1st week of Orientation

 I recently got hired on at a local hospital on the cardiac floor  and just completed my very first week of work.  It was definitely a long and emotional week for me.

 I was called for an interview, had the interview, offered the job,  and  started work within a two week  timeframe.   I had to get my physical done a few days before I started work and since my veins are really hard to get I thought I would drink a few bottles of water, but it ended up being too much and my urine came back diluted.  The hospital called and had me go retake my test but I couldn't P enough the first time so they had me sit out in the waiting room and drink a bunch of water and come back to test again.  I figured all was well so on Monday morning I went in for my first day of orientation.

shawn was able to come home from the station early to be with Micah so i could just get to work.  I managed to get to work very early so I was very relaxed and just went to the room and set up all my stuff and waited for everyone else to show up. I got to sign in and get a bunch of my paperwork filled out and I got my picture taken for my ID. I was there for about an hour and a half before the hiring manager came in and pulled me out and told me that my last urine from Friday morning was diluted again.  Per policy my job offer was to be terminated { although she would call around and see if there was anything that could be done}  and I needed to leave. 😭😭 I could have went back in the room and stayed until the next speaker came so I wouldn't make such an exit.

I was shocked. I was heart broken. I couldn't believe it.

I went to the bathroom and cried while I tried texting my husband, mom, & sister. This couldn't be real, this couldn't be happening. There is no way GOD would really let me get this far and let me down.

I went back into the room and tried to stay while I quietly packed up my stuff { I wanted no attention on me} but eventually the tears were coming out again so I just snatched up the rest of my stuff and basically ran to my car. I called my mom on the way home and just cried into the phone. I tried calling my husband but he wasn't answering the phone so when I showed up at home he had no idea why I was home.  He seemed really confused and didn't really say or do much. I just dropped all my stuff and cried into my can of Dr Pepper.

Eventually my phone rang with some semi good news. It was my hiring manager calling to tell me that she managed to get me one more urine test but that it had to come back testable, {I had to pee and was about to go right before she called} so I ran to my car and drove straight up to the testing center.

I came back home and called her to let her know I got it done and she just said to hang out and wait  until the results came back. LONGEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE!! I had cried myself into a migraine so I just took some meds and went to bed. I woke up long enough to have dinner with Micah and play with him a little before convincing him to go back to bed with me. The next morning Micah woke up at like 6am so I had to wait a long time before I could call and check on my results.

I finally heard from the hospital around 930am and  they said my urine test came back fine and that I could come back to orientation. I'm so excited I hung up the phone and screamed, Shawn and Micah came and gave me a giant hug.  I needed to shower and get dressed and be there by noon.

GIANT SIGH OF RELIEF. Quickly followed by fear and embarrassment. How was I going to walk back into orientation with all the same people ?

 I made it back by noon on Tuesday and sat in the room and ate my lunch that I brought and then we started the RN orientation.  I felt a little lost but everyone was very helpful. We learned how to clock in and we went over some policies and skills. It was a pretty relaxed afternoon of sitting in a classroom setting.

Wednesday was Shawn's day to work so we all had to get up extra early and leave the house.  I dropped Micah off with the baby sitter for the first time, which was difficult even though he was super excited to go to Mrs. Rachel's house, and headed to work. We had computer training for the first half of the day and more training on hospital equipment and policies. Another relaxed easy day. When I got to Rachel's house to get Micah he met me with the greatest excitement about his day and his plans to stay a few more hours to play with Legos, HAHA! I managed to do some grocery shopping, go home and cook dinner, wash the bedding { since Micah wet the bed the night before}, fix lunches for Thursday, get us fed and in bed at a normal time. It felt like a really great day.

Since daddy doesn't get to leave the fire station until 7am I had to take Micah to Rachel's house for a few hours { just until daddy could get there}. I got to the hospital area way too early so I ran over to Panera and grabbed one of their baskets of bagels and as I was coming back to the hospital I realized there were police cars everywhere blocking off streets and parking lots. Thankfully I was in the computer training building which was right off the main road so I could park and head inside. I quickly learned that there was an active shooter situation in the apartments right behind the hospital and that there may have been shots fired at the hospital so our hospital had to go into lockdown.  NEVER have I ever been in a situation like this so I was a little nervous and really didn't know what we were supposed to do.  We ended up leaving our room open for the rest of the class but someone came by and told us to shut it. I am not sure if our  building ever got locked. We looked up the news on the computer and just watched as updates came in between our training. It turns out a couple were shooting { what appeared to be} at the construction workers working on the hospital and this is what started the entire situation.  The couple were arrested and our day went on as normal. Half a day of computer training and then some policy and procedure type training and I was free go home.

Friday we spent the day in the hospital SIM lab, yup we get a SIM lab that I am able to use if I need training on something, the hospital uses it for training in different situations also.  We had a pretty relaxed day going over some more equipment and procedures and then we were able to tear apart a crash cart and just familiarize ourselves with it.

It was a long and emotional week.  Taking Micah to the babysitters was tough because he keeps asking if I am going to my different home now. { daddy works 24 hours so he sleeps at his job when he works, Micah is convinced he had another home and will randomly ask if daddy is "spending the night with us". So now Micah is thinking since daddy is gone for that long then surely mommy is too because that's how jobs work right}.  I'm trying hard to just stay positive because he really LOVES going to Mrs. Rachel's house and playing with her kids and pets and toys, but it's tough because I just want to stay home and snuggle him forever.  I do explain everything To him often. I tell him what will happen before each day so he is aware.

The days he will have to be somewhere for my 12 hour shifts will be so tough on everyone involved but I'm hoping I can always leave him with loved ones or Mrs. Rachel so it isn't so bad on him.

Excuse my spelling and grammar errors. I typed this whole blog on my phone in between parenting and working and getting house chores done!!